Hello guys, I hope it's not forbidden to ask about this here. And I really hope that if my friends somehow read this, they don't get angry at me for sharing. I need help on how to support them better.
Sharon - my best friend from 20 years, has a fiance - Bobby - who is having a terrible chronic pain issue.
Two years ago Bobby started having some peculiar shoulder and back pain - he has visited multiple doctors (I think more than 10) and NONE could tell what was wrong with him. Therapies, MRI's, tests, massages, oils, etc. and nobody could say anything apart from "Well, you're clinically healthy - just wait it out". He even went to a psychologist because he was getting seriously depressed over this. There are good days and there are awful days of severe pain. Year number two is passing and his condition is not improving.
My friend Sharon is understandably having a hard time with this. She is loving and supportive. Because of his pain, they rarely go places anymore, and our meet ups become more scarce. It's hard to talk about stuff, because the conversation always comes down to the inevitable topic of how there is no solution to this problem. Usually they don't know if they will be able to go out until the last moment because of the unpredictability of the pain. It is so bad that Bobby has kind of given up on dreams of having a family or a career - he thinks it's over for him, which devastates Sharon, and me as well.
My question is - can anyone in the same boat as Bobby give me an advice on how I can be supportive when I can't actually bring a solution to the table? These guys are honestly the best and I wish I could make it easier for them.