The nerve block i got so many years ago is still doing its job
But the damage is there, the nerves are still crushed and as i go along the damage progresses as you well know
Its been 3 or 4 days since the cervical neuropathy reared its ugly head
The thumb and pointy finger of my left hand are shot. Cant open a pop bottle for the weakness and touching the keyboard of the phone is like pushing a needle in to the bone of my thumb
The index finger burns down the inside to the tip and holding anything is an excessive exercise in concentration to not drop or turn loose of whatever ime holding.
The left scapula up to my neck is a gordian knot for days and hints of the old pre injury pain has returned
Cervicogenic headaches ,neck strain, and trapezoids are afire
C3 and 4 for this to blame and the others damaged dont help.
Im the smiler, co workers don't know whats hidden except for one of my bosses.
Just because ive accepted the pain doesnt mean i cant rail against it.
The body fails and we sail into that darkness of sef doubt
Where the will is strong but the vessel is weak and unwilling and i turn to waiting for one more chance to move forward
A bit of release..tonite the vessel is empty and i am thirsty...I work at nite and they are turning endless for the pain. Suffering for me is the mental side..the pain is inevitable...its a constant...the mental game is the variable in the equation.
I dont fear the endless wreckage of my condition..ive grown into this crowm of thorns...those prayers whispered to the winds are lost. I don't fear the body drying up and Reed like in the river of life
The flowers have been long pressed and the waters stilled to mirrors. I can remember the smell of the day i pressed them and the waters let me see the past as a mirror.
How long before the next progression?