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HaylieCatOwnerHHaylieCatOwner Posts: 117
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:23 AM in Back Surgery and Neck Surgery
Since my back surgery, I have been amazed at some of the comments people make to me. Sure, most are very sympathetic and supportive, but then there are those that make you pause. Here are just a few:

From one of my secretaries last week when she saw the shoes I was wearing:
"Don't worry, Haylie, ugly flat shoes are IN right now..."

Another one of my secretaries said this to me today:
"So, isn't true that once you have surgery on your back, you will have a backache pain the rest of your life?"

Have you all run into similar comments, or is it just the legal profession that brings out the zingers?




  • Hi Haylie, that is very rude of the shoe comment L) . Hey I like flat shoes, never been much of a heel girl, and now probably will never be. I haven't gotten so much rude comments as people mentioning oh you know with back surgery you may get more problems later. I had a couple nurses who I felt tried to talk me out of my surgery. One told me about her 2 friends who had surgery for spinal stenosis and how they were worse and wished they didn't do it. Another was encourageing me to go to UCSF for a second opinion. I thought about it, but have no one to drive me, so didn't. Anyway, they aren't nice and should be making supportive comments. Just tell them =; =; =; , Sue
  • put a hard collar on and see what people say,.. How about this one,

    Are you sure its not all in your head?
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  • I always get the....."you'll just have to keep having surgeries now" comment. Gotta love that! I also had people try to talk me out of having the surgery-but bottom line is no one else had to live in pain, only me! I am already feeling better than before my surgery-8 weeks post op today!
  • After my first surgery all I ever heard was "Oh I never would let anyone operate on my back. You are gonna regret this. You never should have had that surgery". But like the others said, those people didn't have to live with my pain. They didn't have to face a future of uncertainty because of a broken back. What I did was what was best for me and the future of my children. Yes, it was and still is very painful but I do not regret one bit of it. I actually think its funny now that whenever my youngest draws a picture with me in it, she makes sure she draws a cane for me as well LOL!!!

    But I think what bothers me more than what people say is what they don't. You would not BELIEVE the stares I get. I get looked at like a criminal whenever someone sees me parking in a handicap spot (I have a perm 5 yr tag from the state so i'm legal). Yes, I am able to walk without my cane now but we all have those days when we are just too sore to think about walking from the end of the parking lot. Honestly, I'm dying to have someone come up to me and confront me about it. The one day that I was running some errands, I had parked in front of the mall, in a handicap spot, and right in front of another car. The woman got out the same time I did, and I got "the look". I went in, did what I had to then drove to Walmart. Coincidentally, I had parked in front of the same woman again. I'm limping down the isle in the store, and amazingly this woman almost goes running by me! I find it amazing that I get stares yet someone who is twice my age can outwalk me.
  • I am not surprised. I feel for you..both with your quick onset but also the comments. People are very insenstive and everyone has an opinion. As for the later, I geuss that is why these sites do so well. LOL.

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  • The first day I went back to work from my fusion surgery one of my co-workers commented on how "FAT" I got. Well my mouth got the best of me and I told her "At least I can walk again and I will not always have to be on medication that makes me swell up like a watermelon." Of course nothing was said months later when I was off those medications and did lose 25 pounds.
    Oh and you can't forget about those that know you had back surgery and come up and slap you on the back to say "hello". Mind that before they would not have made the effort to say hello or good morning before.
    I have many other lovely things my co-workers have said and done but for self-preservation I have to laugh it off. The only exception is when they ask me what type of drugs I'm on, then I get serious!
    Although, I am not looking forward to going back to work this time from my SCS implant because of the inconsiderate people I work with.
    I do love my job and miss the feeling of being productive and helping others. We cannot give up on our accomplishments and goals for these ignorant and selfish people.

    I hope everyone is reduced in pain by Love, Laughter and Joy.
  • My co-workers called me House, like the show Dr. House because I was taking vicaden at work. Fortunately I could laugh at the time, but they just don't realize you take it because you have to, not because you want to. I am a little afraid of returning to work, not sure what they will say now that I have had surgery.
  • back to work in pathology for a few months while I was waiting for surgery. As I was unable to stand for 5 mins without my legs going numb it was agreed that I would have a chair in the blood collecting room so I didn't have to stand.
    I had to work an extra day in a different location and when I arrived I said I needed a room with a chair as I was awating surgery for my back.
    The other staff just looked at me and said "well we all have bad backs deary- deal with it!" :jawdrop:
    I went home! :))(
    Sara O:)
  • I can't believe the people that make comments such as "Oh, I bet you are getting a lot of housework done at home". I try to educate them about the BLT restrictions, and joke with them about how dustfree everything is bewteen my waist and shoulders, and how I am an expert with picking up the house using my grabber. I scrapbook as a hobby, and I have had people accuse me of staying home from work just so I could catch up on scrapbooking. The implication that I am staying away from work on purpose is what hurts the worst. I have been a dedicated teacher in my district for 32 years, and I take my role as an educator seriously. Anyone who works in education knows how difficult it is to arrange for a sub. Plus, the first few weeks of school are so important in building a bond with your students. I just do not even know how to begin to respond to that type of comment. But, just for the record, I can return to work at the end of twelve weeks after surgery :-C
  • They say:
    "Don't worry, Haylie, ugly flat shoes are IN right now..."

    You say:
    "And someday honey, they will find a cure for stupidity...."

    Just remember, Mean People Suck.......

    Best wishes to you,
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