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Surgical Stories - The Fun ones!

dilauroddilauro ConnecticutPosts: 12,072
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:29 AM in Lighten and Brighten
Try thinking about your surgeries and if there were incidents were really funny. I am sure that most people have one or two of these.

For starters:

During one of my surgeries, I could not urinate. The doctors and nurses tried all sorts of measures. None of them worked.
One doctor suggested that while I was sitting on the commode, that I should pour this extract of pepermint. that would help me go. Keep in mind, I just had surgery so my mind wasnt as smart as a tack. So there I am in the commode behind the curtains. The doctors asked how I was doing, but then all there was was loud screaming coming from me! Ok, like I said, I wasnt that sharp. What I did, was pour this extract directly on 'you know what' and it started to burn like hell!

Second one, it was during that same surgical time and in recovery. I was waking up at night look at these big
butterflies flying around an orange plant someone brought in. This was happening every night. Of course no one believed me. I asked my wife's sister's husband to help me out. I asked him to bring in some 'illegal' smokes.
Mind you this was back in the 70's and at that time smoking was permitted in certain parts of the hospital. So, here I was about 2:30am, last rounds by night shift nurses was done. I opened the window next to my bed and lit up. I used my sheets to 'hide' the smell. After a few tokes, somehow I dropped the funny cigarette. I started to smell what I thought was the bed sheet on fire. Panic hit me,
so the first thing I could think of was to call the nurses bell ( I didnt what the bed to catch on fire) Well, the nurse came in, got me up and checked my bed. Yep, sure enough there was a half smoked joint that was just starting to burn the sheets!
Needless to say I had to come up with some fancy stories quickly to get out of that one. The nurse just shook her head, got new sheets and cleaned things up. Then very calmly said, you can have this back when you leave!

(Ok, this was mid' 70's so I was just coming out of my college graduation days - somewhat of a rebel.

I am sure others have a lot of good stories to tell



  • Well~Because of my biggest fear,I always choose local anesthesia whenever I can..and some of the medicine they give me in the IV that is supposed to relax me makes me say things that I think.It's as if all of my thoughts just pour out of my mouth.I know this is going to happen,and beforehand I remind myself..but it's like I either forget or have no power at all to just stop my words.

    I told my nurses about this and asked them to stop me if I start saying anything embarrassing-I tend to just say whatever-and there is always a nurse at my head.She laughed and said,"We're used to it,everybody talks and says strange things in the ER because of this medication..and it's usually pretty truthful stuff too because of the type of medication."

    During the surgery I told my surgeon what a "fine lookin' man he was,and that every one of the nurses were smitten with him." Earlier when I was saying things the nurses were just laughing,but when I said that.....well,they really maybe it was just the meds,but it seemed to me that they laughed a little TOO hard,and too long-if you know what I mean.After that the nurse watched me closer I thought..but again,it coulda been just the meds.

    Another time I asked the surgeon (same one) if I would still be able to play the piano.You've heard the joke,Dr Dr will I still be able to play the piano-when the Dr says yes,the patient says"that's good because I never could before." :))( But when I asked I was having foot surgery...and my surgeon did NOT laugh....but I couldn't stop laughing and the nurses were all laughing..not at the joke,but at me for laughing...

    Another time (same surgeon) the Dr was reminding me that I would be immobile for 6 to 8 weeks,and I knew this,but I could have sworn he said 68 weeks,and I sat up in the ER -this during actual operation-and screamed "68 WEEKS!!!"
    They all laughed at that one,but nurses said my BP shot up for a couple minutes..and they gave me more of those meds in my IV.There was a bar with a sheet like thing over it so that I couldn't watch/see what the surgeon was doing-but when I sat up I bumped into it.I'll never forget the panic I felt whenever I thought it was going to be 68 weeks though.

    It's strange how our thoughts all change and get jumbled in the ER.Surreal is how that always feels..weird how it's never a bad feeling even though it's surgery and totally serious.The meds I
  • After one of my surgeries they nurse cam in my room and woke me up from a deep sleep, (the notes said she tried to wake me three times) to give me a sleeping pill! They also bugged me so many times in the recovery room to take a pain med that I finally said yes so they would leave me alone.
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  • For the birth of 3 of my children, I used our family primary care doc rather than an obstetrician/gynecologist. On my fourth child (I have 5), I had some problems and was very nervous about what was going on, but fortunately my baby was born and while they were checking her out for possible problems, I started talking to the doctor. I struck up a conversation about he and his wife and why they only have 2 kids and asked if they want more. We talked about people wanting to give their children up for adoption and I wondered if anyone ever approached him about finding adoptive parents for their child. This all seemed like casual talk to me, and I was just rambling because I was completely worn out from just giving birth and also scared that something was wrong with her.

    Fast forward to my 2 week checkup. The doctor said I'm glad to see you have bonded with your baby, I was worried about you. I'm like "Why?" He wondered if I still wanted to give her away! He thought I was trying to give him my baby when I was asking him about other people trying to find adoptive parents.

    Surviving chronic pain one day at a time, praying for a reprieve because living another 40 years like this doesn't sound too fun!
  • My surgeon for my L-5 S-1 spinal fusion was very nice and joking with me before the surgery. i was a nervous wreck in the OR while I was waiting. My eyes were as big as saucers when I saw all of the equipment that would be used on me. I saw these large bolt cutters that I asked about and the doctor said "don't worry, they are surgical grade". Hysterical right? I suddenly got a bad case of the nervous giggles. Then the doctor was trying to ask me a question just as the anesthesiologist was starting the meds and as i was going under I noticed that he had these tall white boots on and that just made me giggle more. I don't know what the doctor was asking me. I just looked at him and the last thing I said was "nice boots". then I woke up in recovery. This comment struck the doctor as funny, and when he came to check on my recovery, he nick-named me giggle-boots, which stuck with me for my entire 4-day hospital stay. It wasn't funny to laugh for a few days after though, but it did help my mood during my recovery.
  • j.howiejj.howie Brentwood, Ca., USAPosts: 1,741
    I don't remember much during the 3 days between my anterior and posterior surgeries. But I don't think the nurses kept the meds very level.
    I know the entire bay area of ca. very well. I was in San Ramon. And I was absolutely convinced they took me to the helicopter pad and secretly took me to several different hospitals, so it couldn't be traced. And then flew me to Alviso, an out of the way BAD area. To secretly harvest my body parts.
    I kept taking IV's and everything else out and tried to escape. Once I landed on the floor. I figured my body parts were probably pretty worthless and couldn't figure out why they would want them in the first place. But I kept trying to "escape"
    When my wife came to visit me the next day. I tried to explain the "conspiracy" to her. And she said they had moved me several time during the night. Trying to get me closer to the nurses station because I kept setting alarms off. And the last time they moved me was to trade rooms with another patient right next to the nurses station. So they could keep an eye on me! She laughed and thought it was funny. I thought it was real!
    Good luck, Jim
    Click my name to see my Medical history
    You get what you get, not what you deserve......I stole that from Susan (rip)
    Today is yours to embrace........ for tomorrow, who knows what might be starring you in the face!
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  • dilauroddilauro ConnecticutPosts: 12,072
    for extra or unexplained scars! You never know what they did DO!
  • j.howiejj.howie Brentwood, Ca., USAPosts: 1,741
    Has gone down. Maybe I should shave my head and check for scars. =))
    Click my name to see my Medical history
    You get what you get, not what you deserve......I stole that from Susan (rip)
    Today is yours to embrace........ for tomorrow, who knows what might be starring you in the face!
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