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Angry Days

2

Comments

  • Another 'benie' of writing to the beast, and I mean truly writing to him is later on, those letters can be used to communicate to those loved ones to what exactly you are feeling and going through, and how it affects you. If you ever decide that going to a psychologist is something to do, then the letters can be in invaluable tool!

    But the *most* important is they can get your mind to where *it* knows and tells the beast what the deal will be! I hope it helps. *HUGZ*

    Brenda
    PCTF C4 - T2, Laminectomies C5, C6 & C7. Severe Palsy left arm/hand.
  • I think we all have angry days and it makes it worse when we have no one to talk to about our chronic pain. It's good that you came here to vent because we all can relate.
    I too suffered with savage, chronic pain for several years but my anger was directed at my Doctors for not doing more to help me and they were not doing all they could have! And yes...I was very angry about that but I never let them know I was angry. Not once was I rude or demanding. But I am wrambling.
    There are some medications that can make you feel angry and even suicidal. Lyrica is one that comes to mind but there are others. Have you checked all your meds for their side effects? It's just a thought. It's hard enough dealing with chronic pain without meds making thing worse with side effects.
    I never gave up hope that I would get help and I finally did! I now have my life back!! There is help out there but it can take time to find it. Get a second or even a third opinion.
    Come here and vent anytime you need to....we are here to help as much as we can and we do care. Hang on to hope.Never give up your hope.
    Sending you a hug >:D<
    Patsy W
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  • Anne,
    We all have those days and although it is understandable at times, is not acceptable in the way that I behaved because of the pain, only we can decide what we are going to do and in knowing that this is a facet of the chronic pain cycle, we are mandated to seek all help and assistance where possible.

    Anger and pain go together, where those imposed changes impact on us all and the expectation that we had for our lives this was not on the horizon, part of this is getting used to not being able to do as we would like and perhaps changing the concept of our wants into reality.

    It may be helpful to keep a journal of what issues do frustrate you as they do us all and intervene with yourself before the gravity of that issues become more divisive, and the point where we may have a decision to make is where we may continue with the same strategy which initiates the same results, in changing our perception of what and why this is happening we may be able to influence the outcome.

    Many of our historic and current issues are pushed aside and the pressure of that creates some resentment and perhaps bitterness, in talking to others who have faced similar events and constraints we may be able to find suitable proposals or ideas for change. Do not be too hard on yourself and this is a developing process, the distain would be in knowing that this is an issues and continuing with that and not changing or trying to adapt, this issues build up over time and may take equal duration to address, we do have some influence over certain things and what happens and try to change those and not worry about things our of your control.

    Staying permanently positive is almost an impossible objective and however stoic we are we all have times when we have just have had sufficient of all this imposed restriction, trying to redress all of our issues simultaneously is not possible so try and break it down into segments that are easier to change, as each issue is improved you may feel more confident that you have some control however little and collectively things will improve.

    We were encouraged to talk to our sub-conscious and debate the unrealistic expectations we sometimes place on ourselves and why, rationalise a verity of options and try them, this is about making the change and we are all fearful of mistakes. Try to think or reasons why and how to improve rather than ideas and barriers which we all face. Look to the future and the bigger picture. Find someone who can encourage and support your objectives in a rational plan and stay positive, many here have and continue every day to travel that angry road and it is a learning process. I had a few angry years and did not like myself, time experience, support and encouragement has improved my own resolve in coping with the ever present facet of anger, I just manage it more effectively.

    It is normal to be angry and I would have been surprised if you were not, it is not as if I have mastered that change completely and we all continue to have those days however infrequent.

    As Cath said, we are all here for you and others, if venting helps get it our all the better, find what works for you and use it more.

    Take care and be kind to yourself.

    John
  • What are you angry about? Cause, everybody is like mad these days.

    Spam link not allowed. Removed by authority member, Cath111.


  • Anne,
    When I was first injured at work I ended up needing a 2 level cervical fusion (neurosurgeon paralysed my rt. vocal cord) I retore my rt. rotator cuff and have herniations in lumbar area along with rt knee issues. My dr's would not allow me to return to my job after 29 yrs 11 mos and 26 days. The CEO did not file the correct Workmans comp paperwork so 3 yrs later we are still dealing with the legal aspects along with pain 24/7. Also, the people I thought were my dear friends from work all abandoned me. Heard later they were told they could not contact me or face losing their jobs. I thought I was so angry but looking back I believe alot of it was depression. My husband is disabled with a heart condition and I try hard not to burden him although he is so supportive and tells me to let it out if need be. Then I found this support group and what a difference it has made in my life. So many worse off than myself. I decided then the anger and bitterness was actually making my condition worse. Not to say I do not allow myself a few pity parties as we are all entitled to get down in the dumps at times. But I did tell myself to start each day with a positive outlook. Also if I am having a bad day I can open up to my Spiney friends and they totally understand what I am going through, as we are all basically in the same boat. Another thing I decided, I had a neurologist tell me staying in bed is much better for your spine than a recliner. Physically this may be true but mentally I think it is bad. Obviously there are days when I have no choice but a try to get up each day, put on my positive outlook face and sit in my recliner. It makes me feel like I am really trying to be proactive and positive. Good Luck to you. You will find great friends here who will help you. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
    Jan
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  • I love the topic of your post! Lately, when I've been thrown into some new bureaucratic nightmare (it seems that every single bureaucracy I deal with lately is unable to manage people with disabilities) - I rage and laugh to myself - "WHERE'S THAT 'ANGRY' THREAD??!! I am dealing with problems with the IRS, LTD, the Department of Education, Health Insurance, my landlord. And when you try to resolve the problems with any of these clowns, they never get back to you - and you have no way of ever getting back in contact with them. I am totally disabled with chronic pain that the Dr's seem to have little interest or curiosity about "curing" (other than my PM Dr's who are wonderful), my husband is very ill with a chronic, incurable disease, and I am rattled by the many side effects of the medications I take (someone above mentioned Lyrica - yes - Lyrica and Oxycodone CAN MAKE YOU VERY ANGRY - Grrrrr!!! - not to mention 'roid (steroid) rage). Meanwhile - Medicare and Social Security are threatening to crumble beneath our feet - And all the poor unemployed - What shall we do?

    So - I try to keep as relaxed as possible - try to still my trembling hands and calm my pounding heart - look at it all as a job - write my "To Do List" each day, and slowly, methodically, work my way through it. I can do a bit better than you - I can get the bread and milk each day - and that's my socializing - But I make the most of it, and my sister says, I probably make the store keepers day too!

    I feel so weakened by the pain, the pressure, the fact that I don't manage pressure so well anymore, the fear of "losing everything", the endless horror of the maddening complexity of the bureaucracies we have to deal with, not being able to depend on my husband, and all the worry "out there" - OH GOSH!

    I don't know what to say to you - just - keep going, Anne, keep going. I have not been able to work for three years - I would never have believed it, but here I am. And I still have a home - I seem to have to fight for every inch - but - I am not destitute yet. And though my husband is not what he once was - I am so glad to have him with me!!!! There really still is goodness in the world!

    All the best - Thank goodness for all the good people on Spine-Health!
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