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Ready to give up.

2

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  • KelvooKKelvoo Posts: 1
    edited 02/07/2015 - 11:00 PM
    i understand pain and if i wasn't afraid to die i probably would have killed myself by now. i'm losing my hope and faith. i need to make a drastic change, find a better climate than pa, take medicine or start smoking pot.... i fell 175 feet off a cliff when i was 17 and crushed t4 through 6 and part of my lumbar. i had an anterior posterior spinal fusion with rod placement and part of my rib used as well as cadaver bone to rebuild my spine. i had my rods taken out 15 years later. i'm 35 now and everything i do is based on how i feel. i've lost friendships, i've become selfish and like a recluse. the doctors and insurance are a so frustrating. i throw up on every med and then they give you two more meds to help the side affects of the other ones... i just want someone to fix me. i know what everyone says that i'm lucky to be alive after falling that far... no one survives that, but trust me there are days i selfishly wish i hadn't. and i know i could be paralyzed or so many things worse and i feel guilty but at the same time even though you'd never know to look at me or to meet me, i'm in agony. i stumbled upon this site googling for the best places to live for chronic back pain. i'd appreciate any advice on location, anyone with thoracic specialist experience or just thoughts in general. i'm a property manager and i work really hard even though i could be on disability; i like to work, and i want to like my life again but i'm forgetting how to.

    ******
    welcome to spine-health

    use that above hyperlink to help you get started with spine-health and navigate through the system.

    if there are any questions, you can always post them here, send liz or myself a private message or contact ron rdilauro@veritashealth.com

    https://www.spine-health.com/conditions/chronic-pain

    the blend
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