There are no medical professionals on this forum side of the site. Therefore, no one is capable or permitted to provide any type of medical advice.

This includes any analysis, interpretation, or advice based on any diagnostic test

See the Veritas Health sites:,,, for medical articles and videos.

Life on Hold

Anyone else feel like their entire life was just put "on hold"?
I'm trying to cope with my injury which is probably going to be repaired by surgery in February, or possibly sooner, if I can work something out with work.

After that, I know there is recovery time...and then a period of settling to see what kind of progress I make and what I will be able to do.

I KNOW I'll be able to swim. But for whatever reason, I just can't bear to purchase some of the swimming stuff I need, despite the good sales going on right now. We have plans for an epic distance swim that I was going to do even before the injury, but yet now I feel like I don't need that equipment and that I'm wasting money.

Part of me feels as if making plans will help me to feel more "alive" but I just keep hitting the "hold" button.


  • Sometimes, just the act of doing something, or making plans, can help you get some emotional relief in what has been a very difficult adjustment to an acute spinal injury. Anyone who has had a slipped disc and literally been on his or her back for recovery knows how depressing things can get. In my situation, I am a planner, and if I can take action by making plans, I feel a cathartic release and that I have a small amount of control in a very uncontrolled situation.

    Good luck
    2015: Thoracic protrusions C7-T1, T3-4, T6-8
    Dec'13: 360FusionL4-S1 w/bone graft
    2013: 3x2-level disc injections: 12mo surgery postponement
    Dec'12: DiscogramL4-S1
    Sep/Oct'12: Bi-lateral Rhizo AblationsL4- S1
  • It may not be when we'd like. It may be never. I have a drawer full of designer high end shoes. In my size.. And for you ladies I'm an 11...or for you men. I'm a 9. Yeah. I know. They make shoes that look hot. It was the only selfish splurge this poor girl saved for. Because their soft leathers look and feel so right. They are in a drawer in my downtown corporate business formal environment.
    I cried when my AFO (ankle foot orthotic=Zomg please please no!) team told me I should never wear heels again.
    At least your goal sounds more reasonable or at least less shallow than mine.

    I wore some kitten heels to a wedding and hung off my husband and ditched my cane for a night too. We all deserve to live. Never give up on that. Live your new life for a bit and you'll get your old self back. Or love your new self. Do not waste another second.
  • advertisement
  • "Spiney" pals. It really could be worse. I've had some time to think which has been rare with the intensive training cycles I was on. I think I'll order the swim tights tomorrow (Protect against Jelly fish stings). I can at least wear them pool walking....right?
    Shoes, I really understand the shoe thing. I could shop for shoes forever...

    We've discovered that this herniation is probably related to an unusual genetic syndrome causing extreme flexibility I know deep down that when the disc is cleared up, everything is going to change, how much. At least there is always swimming... right?
  • RangerRRanger on da rangePosts: 1,033
    edited 11/29/2014 - 4:39 PM
    Hello RunnerHKT,

    I know what you are feeling but I'd go ahead and plan for that epic swim. You first need to be careful post-op and follow doctors orders. Discuss your plan with your medical team, set small goals that are easily attainable, then when are given the go ahead by your doctor, train hard for that swim, and the others to follow.
    So get busy and get the equipment you will need, it will give you incentive and something to look forward to.
    Best of luck with your surgery.
  • dilauroddilauro ConnecticutPosts: 12,072
    No problem putting your life on hold, at least for a little while.
    You are young, you are energetic and you seem so full of life and doing so many things.

    How bad will it really be in the scope of everything if you held off perhaps a year before going epic!
    Get yourself back into training, slowly, smartly and with the approval of your doctor.. So many professional athletes were able to return to their positions when the rehab was done smartly.

    One step at a time. Plus this way when you take those steps you will feel really good about that move and how you are going to get to the next step. Just always make sure you are looking to getting to that next step, the one after that and the one after that.
  • advertisement
  • I understand about life being 'on hold' I feel like mines been like that for the last couple of years. By the time I had a diagnosis, conservative treatment, surgeries & now recovery.

    My husband and I planned & took a 9 week road trip last year. Even though I had loads of medication. & some days were awful in the car it was good to get away. We did a trip this year 3 months post my second discectomy & I really lacked the enthusiasm to go. I still made the most of the trip but was ready to be home after the 4 weeks. I've since had a fusion & at 4 months post fusion still feel life is on hold, but can see the big picture :)

    It's good to look forward to something, even if it's small. I hope your road to recovery give you the outcome you desire,
    Microdiscectomy L5S1 January 2014
    Microdiscectomy L5S1 March 2014
    Fusion L5S1 11th August 2014
  • At least, i know I'm not alone. Yesterday I started to think about what it might feel like to just move without having to plan every little movement. To drop something and not have it be a major project to figure out how to get it up off the floor. It's been so long now that I can not imagine what that might be like. I see the Neurosurgeon this Friday. I am hoping he will see how I just have not progressed along a healing trajectory, and we can just get the surgery. When I was first injured I was all about "avoid surgery at all costs" I really didn't know the costs. Now, all I want is the surgery which as I've been told will cure this ongoing miserable pain...
  • daleyycddaleyyc Posts: 11
    edited 12/02/2014 - 6:18 AM
    Yes, I totally feel 'on hold', and I totally get it. I wished my family and friends did. I'm 5 months post-microdiscectomy and doing all of the rehab exercises my PT and surgeon gave me, and counting the walking, it's about 4 to 5 hours a day. Pre-surgery I was first waiting to see if conservative care would work, then not sure if I'd even wake up on the other side of it so I was 'on hold' for several months. Now I'm 'on hold' until I have my strength back and I'm confident that I can do things without my back ruling my schedule. My ex-wife left me two weeks after the surgery and quite a few friends and family are urging me to 'get back on the horse' - even to the point of wanting to set me up. But again, I feel like I'm really 'on hold' again until I'd guess a year or so post-surgery and I have a pretty good idea how I am going to be feeling in the long run - about the timeline that my GP and PT both gave me. I totally sympathize with the 'on hold' feeling - I'm still there! It is frustrating, but you find out who your real friends are.
Sign In or Join Us to comment.