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Need Support

hello, I'm new to the site.  I need to talk to people who have gone through/are going through the same things as me.  I have had neck, shoulder, arm, elbow pain since Sept 2015.  I have been to a pain mgmt doctor, my family doctor, a chiropractor, a shoulder surgeon, a neck surgeon, and a pain mgmt doctor that just does injections in addition to physical therapist and a therapist.  I have been on leave from work since Feb 2016.  I have had to beg and plead to have my leave approved by one or more of these doctors.  I was in so much pain at work and so exhausted I would go to the restroom and cry and consider taking little naps while there.  I just had a radio frequency ablation on Thurs April 21, tomorrow it will be a week since the procedure.  I'm still in pain (which is normal they say), I am exhausted, and I am severely depressed.  I have to go back to work on Monday but there is no way.  I call my family doctor and left a message that she had to approve the leave longer, her office calls back and says "no, you need to go back on Monday".  I feel so let down by the medical field in the sense that I feel like they think I'm crazy and that the pain really isn't that bad, that I'm just trying to get more time off.  At this point I feel like the only thing I can do is quit my job and wait until, hopefully, the ablation provides some relief.  My husband and my sister tell me, "don't let them make you feel this way, stand up for yourself" but I honestly feel like a child trying to talk my mom into letting me stay home from school.  I have left many, many details out of this story so if you have any questions please ask.  Basically, am I crazy?  Am I the only one who has been let down by the medical professionals I have placed all my hope on?


  • LizLiz Posts: 9,699
    welcome akutz

    please click on the link for useful information

    welcome to spine-health


    Veritas-Health Forum Moderator

    Spinal stenosis since 1995
    Lumber decompression surgery S1 L5-L3[1996]
    Cervical stenosis, so far avoided surgery
  • dilauroddilauro ConnecticutPosts: 12,571
    If you feel that you have been let down by the medical field, have you told them so and asked why hey denied an extra stay of leave?
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  • ron is right, dont just take no for an answer, ask why they wont approve your leave. there may be a really good reason they've denied it. if it is as simple as they just havent been listening to you when you say youre in pain or they dont believe it. ask for a referal for another doctor, preferabily one who thinks he has ears so he can listen not to keep his head from leaning to one side.  
  • SavageSavage United StatesPosts: 7,241
    you have a difficult situation. i would think the pain management doctor to be most aware of your pain levels and more likely to write off for continued leave.

    maybe patient - doctor communication not clear enough...?
    sometimes it may be that we are leaving out something, symptoms.....not  knowing to tell, maybe thinking it's not important...or doctor never asked so we didn't think to mention.

    for ex...have you spoken to your pain doctor, or primary, about feeling severely depressed and exhausted?
    that is symptom that although it often accompanies chronic pain, should not be accepted as normal, and can be treated.

    when i first was in the pain of the unknown, i referred myself to psychiatrist and did some therapy.
    at that time, psychiatrist wrote on script that i ..."needed two weeks off work beginning immediately."

    and at that time, doctor wrote for the two weeks off due to my pain and exhaustion.
    of course, the reason was not written for employer to see.

    my employer responded as she should. she made copy of script for my file and told me to take care...and i left the questions asked, as, at least at that time, medical information is confidential.
    i could feel that she wanted to ask me questions, but she didn't ......and i didn't offer her any conversation.

    also, there are some antidepressants that are also to work with pain relief. doctor may be able to help with that.
    and treatment and or addressing the depression..does not need to be a forever thing..
    just for you to get over the hump of this transition in your life.

    the process of discovering ...and ruling out ...causes of pain can be a roller coaster experience..
    it is trial and try again.

    but you have to know what you feel. if you think you are crazy, you may be perceived that way.

    you need to know your pain! sometimes some of us tend to minimize our experiences.
    that was my tendency and it was if a switch clicked....when i thought of a child or loved one going through my experiences.

    for ex...if you had a child or young sibling, would you let them continue to be dismissed by those who should help her?
    i would think not! you'd advocate for her because you know she needs medical help.

    now you need to do that for yourself! you are the best caregiver for you!
    continue to repeat your symptoms, so doctors know your situation not yet resolved.
    continue to ask question and have answers that you understand.

    all of this to are not alone!

    Honorary Spine-Health Moderator
    Please read my medical history at: Medical History

  • Thank you all for your responses.  As of today I quit my job so I can focus on getting better.  I have found a new family doctor and will get a referral from my therapist for a psychiatrist to work with potentially changing meds.  I'm hoping since I don't have the pressure of being pain free so I can go back to work will help.  
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