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No where to turn

Hi everyone,

I haven't posted in a really long time, so I can copy my history here if needed.

Today is a really sad day for me. I went to see my PM. The last treatment he gave me was in January, I had Botox injections in my back and he prescribed me Amitriptyline .. which neither worked.

Before that he had given me Nabilone, which mostly made me feel terrible and I felt like I was in a fog or a daze. Everything was hazy.

Last year, he mostly tried various antidepressants.. I was on Cymbalta, Lyrica and some others I can't recall the names of. Given Meloxicam, Toradol and after that I've pretty much lost track.

I have tried ointments and creams, hot and cold packs to no avail.

Today, my PM told me that we have exhausted all options and that there aren't any treatments left to try or medications to try. He told me that my last resort is MM and that even that may not work.
I really feel so hopeless, I just want to cry. Am I a special snowflake? Why doesn't one single thing at least some what ease my pain, I don't understand what's wrong with me.

Has anyone else gone through the same thing as me? Is there anything out there that will make my back bearable? 

My pain is unfortunate mostly localized to my central lumbar, between the bottom of my shoulder blades and although I have bad flare ups where it will be the majority of my back its mostly in the central area.

I just feel like a big piece of crap and don't understand what's wrong with me. I'm sorry for this huge rant, but I've just never been so upset in my whole life and just don't know what to do. Nobody seems to understand.
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Comments

  • dilauroddilauro ConnecticutPosts: 12,072
    edited 07/20/2019 - 9:52 AM
    you are basically in the same situation as hundreds of us are in. finding the right mix of medications, ointments, over the counter medications,e tc to help you back pain is the biggest challenge. top that off, by saying that some of the medications that might help you conflict with another medication you are taking.  
    so, believe me, you are no different than so many others trying to find pain relief. and almost everyone on this site completely understands where you are coming from and what you are dealing with. 
     
  • Lisa01LLisa01 CanadaPosts: 26
    edited 07/20/2019 - 9:54 AM
    Thank you Ron.


    I might also add, that I am not on ANY medications. Not one single thing. So while many folks out there at least have something, I literally don't have anything at all. I'm not sure how he figures every option has been exhausted, because I know I haven't been given the opportunity to try "every option" available. And MM is not something I ever pictured, or even thought about doing. Why should that be my last and only option? I feel upset by that too.

    I will find a place where I can try aqua aerobics, it's not something I really thought could work but I will definitely seek it out.

    I have been looking into a tens machine, but I am kind of stuck on which one that I should get.
    Maybe you may have some advice on this?

    I am sorry for my ranting. I just feel very upset and very broken. 
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  • Lisa most community pools have the aqua fit classes. I hope you can get a referral to a large hospital with a Pain Clinic. You many benefit from some other methods of treating your pain. I went to Mt. Sinai in Toronto but am going somewhere else now. I used to get injections at a pain clinic but its best to get it done under live xray at a hospital pain center. Your Family Dr. will refer you. Its about a 6 month waiting list but worth it in the long run. It helps to get support here. Keep us posted. Charry
    DDD of lumbar spine with sciatica to left hip,leg and foot. L4-L5 posterior disc bulge with prominent facets, L5-S1 prominent facets with a posterior osteocartilaginous bar. Mild bilateral foraminal narrowing c-spine c4-c7 RN
  • dilauroddilauro ConnecticutPosts: 12,072
    Lisa,  we are not allowed to promote or give out brand names.   But if you go into your local drug store (or a Costco) there should be several different tens machines you could buy.  You can get a nice one for under a $100
    They should all have
    • Different power levels
    • Rechargeable battery preferred over disposable batteries
    • 2 sets of Gel pads
    • Timer option
  • Lisa01LLisa01 CanadaPosts: 26
    edited 03/10/2017 - 12:21 AM
    Hi autonomic,

    Thus is all the information from my most recent MRI. 

    Compression Fracture 

    Cervical Kyphosis, compression amd deformity and Degeneration C3-C4.

    Type II Endplate Degeneration C3-C5

    Disc Bulges C3-C4 and C6-C7 which compress/impinge thecal sac.

    Cord signal change with hyperintense areas C3-C4

    Disc bulge T7-T8 which impinge thecal sac and cause deformity 

    Central disc protrusion T5-T6 which compress/impinge cause deformity

    Parts of it I understand and other parts, not so much... this was a result of falling head first into a bath tub at work. The first few years I thought I was fine and it has just gotten worse the last 3 years or so.

    I went to see my PM on Tuesday and he told me that there is nothing more that he can do for me, and that my last option is get a license for MM which I had told him from the beginning no.

    I have done personal training, exercise, stretching, infrared saunas to reiki. The majority of medication he was willing to try for me were all antidepressants, other than Toradol, Meloxicam, Nabilone and Amitriptyline.
    I have done injections, ultrasound and tens machines.

    I am allergic to codeine, so I am unable to take or try anything in that family of medicines.

    Sometimes having hot packs helps a little bit, but I can't really walk around with one on... since that doesn't exist.

    Recently, I don't know if it's related to my back.. but I've had a terrible pain in my leg that goes from the bottom of my bottom to my feet, only on my right side though.

    I'll edit this again if I can think of other things to add.

    I just don't understand how he says we have exhausted all avenues, when I know we haven't. 
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  • Lisa, not all PM doctors prescribe pain medications. Maybe he has exhausted all options because his office does not handle medication treatments. I would get all of your medical records, with a note from him dismissing you with good cause, and find another PM doctor. I'm not saying narcotic medications are the way to go, but it can't hurt having someone else look at your situation. 


    Retrolisthesis C4 of C5 and C5 of C6
    Spondylolthesis C5/C6
    Disc protrusions with Annular Tears C3/C4, C4/C5, and C5/C6
    Disc Material Compressing Spinal Cord C3/C4
    Severe Forminal Stenosis C5/C6
    DDD
    Ankylosing Spondylitis 
    Annular Tears L3/L4 and L5/S1
    Enlarged Facet Joints/Facet Anthrosis L3/L4/L5
    PLIF with Rods, Cage, and Pedicle Screws-L4/L5
  • Dawn GDDawn G Posts: 6
    edited 03/12/2017 - 6:48 PM
    Lisa01.   All we need to do to see your story is to click on your name.  What you want us to see is written in your profile so you don,t need to re-write it.
        I have read your story and what the replies were.     You say you don't have healthcare.  Should you be on disability?   Is this a work related injury?  Are you on workman's comp?   I see you have not had any surgical interventions?  Have you ever seen a spinal specialist?    I also have chronic pain from my spinal conditions, but I have tried almost everything that is out there.
       Right now, I am stretching, walking, using heat, pain patches and an anti depressant.  It is slow going, some days are harder than others.  Some are unbearable, sometimes I think I can get through it......   I wish I could meditate.  I tell myself mind over matter.  What ever I can do, I will do.  But it seems as if you have been treated by one PM and that is all.    I also agree with Jillybean, keep looking.
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